no more hot dogs for you........
fine no more vajj for you
you could play connect the dots with the people ive fucked in this room
It was one time. Now I have to constantly remind her my name is Jessica not Jizzica.
its simple. when his lips are on my clitoris i want to marry him. when they are speaking i want to kill him.
of all the people in our graduating class, this is exactly who would get pregnant.
you want a dog just so you can strap a barrel of hot chocolate around its neck?
She only spoke Russian, but she was so gorgeous it didn't matter
Oh. I think she ate all the cake and took our vodka...still gorgeous.
Let's just say after this weekend I'm known as Shameous the Irish bar fighter.
It's pretty fantastic. I just wanna know how your bra ended up in the aquarium the other night.
Just made out with the guy who gave me my tour. Full circle college win.
Just saw the mall santa roll by on a rascal scooter holding a chic-fil-a milkshake and stop to chat up trio of cute 20-somethings. New hero.
It's finals week and I'm halfway done with this bag of wine and don't plan on stopping. Say goodbye to my GPA
I thought accidentally shaving off my fingertip while trying to shave my butthole was going to be the most unexpected part of my day, but no
To be honest, I'm more surprised when you're not high at this point
she referred to her cum as “pussy butter” so needless to say we had a good night
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