mom took my condoms, found one in the trash the next day
I know she was great
you drank a bottle of vodka and then while throwing up in my toilet you kept reminding me our hs reunion was in 2 yrs and it was time to start getting thin again anyway
I just watched a video of Justin Bieber kissing a girl..... the sad thing is that I actually got upset.
Using a Nedi Pot after doing lines... at least I'm a health conscious drug user?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Resolution for 2011: blow jobs are a privilege, not a right.
Bob the builder, bob the uilder bob the builder bbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbjbbbbbiotch!pp!!!!
You kept telling me how warm your bag of vomit was and asked me if i wanted to feel.
he went at my nipples like a starved dog.
I can't say "baby i'm to high to talk to you" in Starbucks.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
May 25th. Drunk Laser Tag party to celebrate our bdays. May 26th. Mushrooms at Chattanooga Aquarium. Damn
The attempted closet masturbation was unforgivable.
That was the most fucked up I've ever seen him. He had the fucking Canola Oil!
I'm prostituting myself for tickets to Disney World. There's a contradiction there.
I'm excited for him and his new girlfriend. I'm just going to miss his penis is what I'm saying.
I just had a 10 minute staring contest with my dog. Can you come over?
im just letting you know I walked in on you with four different guys last night. a. you were all naked. b. they're all roommates
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