the next pure michigan commercial i see, i am going to pee in a fucking lake
I'm torn. Shes everything I ever wanted, but I just cant get past the story about having drunken sex with her dog in high school.
when your hometown is famous for abortion clinic bombings, hurricanes, and jude law's newest bastard, its probably time to move.
I found your twin in sf. His name is ryan. And you are the evil one.
I wish everyone walked around campus with a video of what they did this weekend above their heads.
Adams eating in the shower, he says it's one of his favorite places to eat. Btw it's milanos he's eating, he says he loves italy too.
As it turns out, drunk trust falling that guy at the top of the waterslide didn't really work out for anyone..
You should fuck with them and beat off in the cup and then walk out an be like, "This was a sperm donation right?"
My way of showing team usa support, bronze: handy silver: bj gold: home run. God, I'm patriotic
Weed is now completely legal in Colorado and Washington. I repeat weed is now legal! I'm putting a deposit down on a house as we speak.
ROADTRIP.
I remember doing shots of gin, then I have this strange memory of us making out in the womens room at waffle house.
I regret none of it.
Stormed out of the house in frustration and now I'm in public and have to take a rage dump. Today sucks.
well I tackled her when she was going to go upstairs because I was convinced that the house was haunted. You gotta stick together in horror movies.
I guess it's too forward to greet him with a blow job?
My life is far to together for someone who's such a hot mess inside
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