3:40 am: you never wrote back on my facebook wall
Joe is yelling at the trees again.
i guess that's what happens when you find your girlfriend at the zoo
I've decided that my new worst fear is that I'll end up on "I Didn't Know I was Pregnant"
just puked a little into my hand/sleeve. way too hungover for the first day of class
I'm just sad for you. It sucks that the 17 douchebag asshole guys you're fucking can't morph into one nice, normal, non-alcoholic guy that has a drivers license and no criminal history.
The security guard popped his head over the mens room door and goes "nice tits- now get out." Deer in headlights moment right there.
I realized after pounding back 151 and head banging into each other to "the drop" of that dub step song, that we weren't meant to have boyfriends at this point in time.
I just pictured my inhibition personified as little pink piggies with wings flying off into the great wide nowhere hahaha
I walked by the two of them and mouthed "fuck me" based on there reaction I think they just came in their pants
I also slapped not one but two bananas on the ass, twerked in public, and I think I made out with someone
so like what it comes down to is do I wanna look like a boss ass bitch or do I wanna masturbate.
His dick isn't even good enough to be this much of an asshole
Does your balding hurt less when a 19 year old holds your hand?
I suppose writing him up is more professional than keying his car.
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