So I have to go swallow an entire zebra. Ur on ur own girl.
Nice. Sry i missed. Also sorry that i pissed on my toothbrush last nite
Sink seemed easy target but balance was no good
I thought he was joking about bailing you out until I saw the picture of you and the sheep in the morning paper. Were those my boots you had on it
End of the semester and I banged 14 freshman. I'm like my own welcome to college orientation guide.
I mean looking back on it, it's unlucky but at least now we can say we were in jail from 2011 to 2012
That's thinking positively..
If you come home soon there's a stripper in the shower. Don't be alarmed
I'm not even mad. I was just trying to get a boner, you're the one that had to see that
Ya. My thumbs are those buffalo's, but my legs are spirits and my torso is that Indian guys and my head is the eagle
The last thing I remember is him yelling from across the room "WE FINISHED THE HANDLE!"
It was 11pm.
Cheese, the small of a woman's back, the universe, mountains, vampiric demons, sleep, and dreams.
how do i act around someone who's shoes i puked in while naked and blackout?
Shes the whorey leader of that wolf pack, and all the less whorey wolves report back to her. She teaches them the ways
What do you want. Tryin to service my husband like the good wife that I am. It is bj Tuesday
TSA found the edibles
Fuck
Oh my god he just. Swiped them for explosives and handed them back to me
God bless California
Vocabulary what?!? Shakespeare is my bitch.
Randomize
