I was about to buy asher roth's album and then i realized he was a ginger. can't support
its a saturday night. im home alone watching legally blonde, eating week old birthday cake and drinking milk out of the carton. so yeah im doing real well
By the way, turns out "Danny B" is his penis. Not his cousin. I was right.
I'm just gonna go nail your roommate after we break up anyway.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I left two hundred in singles in your car sorry about the mess
Let's just go topless and paint glitter over our nipples who the fuck cares
My overnight senior got drunk and hooked up with Kaylee on Sunday. I checked Facebook and he already put down his deposit for next year. This school should pay me a commission.
i'm taking a spore imprint of the mushroom we found growing in our bathroom and sending a picture to ryan. he will then be able to tell if it's trip-worthy
It is too early in this hangover to be seeing some guys ass crack.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I couldn't find my shirt this morning so I stole one from his eight year old sister. Slutted up my outfit quite a bit.
For future reference, don't put tape on your nipples. Ouch.
BTW, does Anne know that we used the lipstick she is currently wearing to was used to write the word "ASS" on my ass cheeks last night?
Not sure what happened last night, but I woke up without a shirt on and cereal glued to my boobs...
went out to hit golf balls, ended up doing splits at the bar. you're a bad influence.
I mean, if I asked you, would you cum on cotton candy for me?
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