just took a sink shower in Arbys bathroom
New high or new low? Cat walked into the bathroom while I was taking a #2, looked @ me, sneezed and walked out..
Why are we friends again?
Just had a serious bathroom emergency at walmart a and it appears that i ate a taco bell burrito wrapper last night
is it just my freshly shaved vagina or is the guy at the end of the table pretty cute??
It was the most graceful puke ever. I just thought she dropped something underneath the bar until she told me what happened.
i just complicated the hell out of my summer by fucking him this early on
Next test. Underwater blowjob. If you fail...out of water blow job
i just peed with my friends in your backyard... do you still live here
Somehow ed fucked carrie while purposely not saying a single word to her all night. He just nodded and smiled.
Would it have been easier if he talked to her?
Yeah, but i bet him he couldn't do it. Now he gets a free taco bell combo of his choosing.
You know it was a good night when you're lying on the couch in your pjs at 4pm having a pitcher of ice water for breakfast.
I was like kind of drunk but mostly just very enthusiastic about beyonce
woke up in a random sweater in a random bed in a random house on a street I don't recognize..
also, I vaguely remember swapping shirts with some random guy on the dance floor.
Just got to Evans to buy weed. His mom showed up unannounced. Now the three of us are chillen. Super.
hot take: drunk me can walk through walls?
He was calculating the number of ceiling tiles when I was on top it was fucking rain man.
Randomize
