I understand how i shit in my shoes, but explain why you were wearing them.
Draw a picture of yourself puking and peeing on her and give it to her with a note that sys this could be your future if you be my friend
Roller skating + drunkeness + peeing = mess
do guys with small dicks even attempt to pursue romantic relationships?
We're too lazy too send a pic of out balls. Just assume this is a pic of our balls and respond accordingly.
Recent Google searches: "babu kangarooz"... "why 2 tacos bell" and "is dinosaur in real life"
Normally I would go for him, but there's just way too much vodka under the bridge for that
I woke up to find his roommate face down on the couch with no pants on, with a sticky note that said "was lost but now am found"
Ginormous penis in the breeze, cumming champagne showers into your eye
holy fuck man...it feels like I got beat the fuck out of by death's baseball bat...chimichangas?
I was just doing the math on how much beer we need for the houseboat. in doing so, I came to the conclusion that we need to open a beer distributor business.
I fell asleep in the bathroom during my mothers dinner party with no pants on. Her friend walked In. I was told to not come back.
It's okay. I think we're back on. I just went on a dog walk with him n blew him on a sidewalk
should i be that dick who brings a carpet in an uberpool
Why are you moving a carpet?
it's unimportant
I just found your shirt hanging in a tree 4 blocks from the party...in the opposite direction of your house. where are you going?
Randomize
