is it just me, or are high schoolers getting sexier?
What part of "you pissed in the tent" do you not understand?
he then proceeded to tear down my curtains, wrap them around his waist, and use the rod as his "rod"... you tell me how drunk he is...
Meeting relatives from another state drenched in tequila and smelling of weed. I'm gonna kill you for soaking the only bra I brought in Jose Cuervo Gold.
the last guy with this job had a bookshelf fall on him. He's in the Er. Im high and they gave me his shift. How do you think i feel?
I NEED YOU TO TELL ME ITS OKAY TO BE THIS HIGH
Yes
O.K.
The feeling I get when I hear beer bottles clinking must be what children feel when they hear sleigh bells on Christmas Eve
He did a line of coke off my stomach then flipped me over and smacked my ass. Then, while he was talking dirty to me, he told me he wanted to hire someone to clean my room. And that's when he lost his boner. Life is so hard.
I just audibly asked myself if i wanted to masturbate.
And then audibly agreed
Some toppless girl just walked past me in the hall and gave me half a carton of smokes. I have never been more aroused.
I'm told I threw my cigarettes at the TV one by one Shouting about the cast of Community.
The best part about daylight savings time this weekend is we get an extra hour to be fucked up.
I think my pussy is going to freeze to the ground
He is a sex God. It lasted more than an hour, and I don't remember how many times I came. I lost count at 57.
I think the cats may be lesbians. It could just be a two hour mutual bath but it sure looks like a 69.
Randomize
