you really are a gigantic fucking slut.
sidenote: just remembered sarcasm does not translate through text
it's probably a bad thing that i wasn't even offended, huh?
And he just showed me his vera bradley wallet...
Soo both my 8 year old sister and fuck buddy are named Sarah..
this can't be going anywhere good
nooope. guess which one i texted last nite to come over so i could "punish her pussy"? =\
Sunburnt clitoris. How do I deal with it.
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kinda considering buying a life alert for sophmore year
he made a joke about you fucking his daughter...i think youre golden
I just sent you a google doc listing all the reasons why I should stop hooking up with him. Feel free to add to it.
He was trying to hotbox the banana suit. Of course we traded him for vodka.
I'm trying to ve beat feiesnd sent.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why can't people give useful wedding gifts...like sex swings or Nutella?
Going to be a long day. text me later. Sorry I puked in your sink.
How drunk do you guys plan on getting?
We wrote our addresses on our arms for the cab driver, what do you think?
you ran up to the police and said "fuck the police shit we living in hell ". Then you dropped your Margarita and said "Darby Out" lol
I honestly just wanna put my face in her tits and disappear from this plane of existence
So, I think think I left my underwear at your house. Well...not exactly your house but your roof.
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