Journey is playing on the radio....I think it is a sign I am going to pass my drug test
Dude, she's so old there's a chalk outline where her reproductive organs used to be.
Take your time, they're doing body shots off the dog.
I don't think I have ever puked up that much free breakfast in my life...thank god for Nickle Beers.
my co-worker, his best friend who also works with us, an my baby daddy, ive turned love triangle into a retarded shape with to many sides to pronounce
we went to the bar with our boss and you tried to play a song from the atm machine
I puked in my fridge last night while I was trying to get water
All i'm saying is it doesn't matter how drunk you were, at 26 years of age you should always remember to take down you pants before you shit in the toilet
Just casually ripping a bowl in the chicken coop, with the chickens. NBD
I'm ok. I've got the pantsless-with-dignity thing down pat
You know how I know she's ugly? 97% of her profile pics are flowers or animals. And what do we know about pretty people and the Internet?
He said something last night about making crepes, but after getting pissed on in bed, I question everything.
Listening to The Little Mermaid soundtrack should cure my drunkeness right?
This is the fifth time tonight that girl has taken off my pants. Take me home. Now.
He woke up and decided to go for a swim in the lake... At about 3am... With his dogs
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