He spelled "beautiful" wrong in his text
Revenge fucks should not count towards the total number. They're justified.
open bar reception. dayglow. pray for me
She showed up to the party with a live octopus and a 30 pack that was already half gone
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She was bending and I said "finally, about time". Wrong, she was tying her shoe. No blowjobs for me.
Putting Chia seeds in beer makes it ok for my diet, right?
He has no idea he's waking up in slut palace tomorrow morning
you asked the cab driver if he wanted to meet your parents, last night.
Fall is here I will miss walking downtown in nothing but paint and pasties
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just for future reference. Do not do zumba while stoned out of your mind.
That's brilliant but could get us arrested. Give me shots until I shout LET'S DO THIS
I just woke up and I don't really remember anything past 1pm. How much am I missing?
A good 10-11 hours. You got laid twice. Also, you out-ran a cop and played football with a lamp.
This is why I love being gay. I could never afford that much birth control.
be the chaos you wish to see in the world...
i'm trying to figure out how to respond to that in text
Of course he did! You’ve seen my tits, you know he didn’t stand a chance!
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