life just isnt the same w/o real world cancun
I think even Ryan Seacrest is disgusted with the thought of Ryan Seacrest getting some.
so i had sex last night with my 12th partner, but hes number 1 for my first time using a condom. i think im finally learning.
his apartment was in a funeral home, walk of shamed through a visiation in the skankiest outfit i own
just used my nephews bottle to take my birth control
Maybe we could get a groupon for vasectomy. I'm game.
We couldve played the bring a random boy to lunch game but i made him go home
i'm eating pizza lunchables and telling my boyfriend he can do better than me because i am a functional adult
At least you didn't sleep with Ashley's uncle.
I made a nest in his bed. I'm not leaving
I just swiped right for a guy on Tinder solely because it looked like he was holding Zoboomafoo
I always knew I would be boring and die in an Uber.
There are way too many people I have fucked in this class for this not to be awkward
they were drunk. and loud. and now they're drunk and quiet. or dead, you never know.
he said he only had one rule...that he'd only go down on me 3x a day. so far this is turning into the best relationship ever.
Randomize
