I dont need to watch it. And stop comparing your life to Entourage.
no really all good couples have similar hair colors!
you went around grabbing cigarettes out of peoples mouths and claiming you were curing cancer.
On the way home from Florida I threw up at the beginning border and ending border of 6 states. You win this year Spring Break.
Just threw up at the bar from the heat. Fun change of pace.
just when i thought i had forgotten how badthe sex was he comes across campus solely to say hi
Pulling over on the side of the road to set off fireworks was the worst idea you have ever had. I don't care if it was called a friendship pagoda.
There was a guy on the elevator dressed as santa in flip-flops giving away beer.
I WISH WE COULD PLAY THE DRINKING GAME TOGETHER AND THEN BANG FOR AMERICA.
I feel like the way dolphins mate would be the approach that a guy would have to use in order for you to sleep with them
I honestly feel really bad for any girl with a period that lasts more than a day
Everything about that text makes me want to throttle you and cry
I just got fingered in the Win-Co parking lot for pills. How's your meltdown going?
He legit watched "Cops" the entire time he was fingering me.
I wish there was an emoji for sad lady boners
I gotta stop fucking the bouncers. We are running out of bars to go to.
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