all we need is a web designer
and a bunch of prostitutes
I think I just met the technical qualifications for binge drinking in five minutes
i think i recognize dicks better than faces
Do you think we're allowed to sign male strippers into the building with a valid id?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just had to shower sitting down. i hope this isn't an indicator of how the rest of my week is going to go.
oh don't forget that when we go furniture shopping we have to find a matching bong so put more money in the furniture fund
Plus my stomach has been speaking through my ass all day sending notes saying "fuck you" and "this is from your liver" or "i will kill you."
What's more awkward than your little brother in law screaming, "I SAW YOUR TITTIES" at the breakfast table?
His step dad chiming in on the jokes.
If he doesn't fuck you on the 4th of July, he doesn't really love this country.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's so in love with you that you could fuck a blood relative and he'd be like "I just want you to be happy"
get your sex hands out of my capn crunch
There's hope in those eyes, for a better tomorrow or more cocaine, we may never know, but there's hope.
Im glad your laughing because im currently convincing my penis you didnt mean it and its all gunna be ok.
You ever have a fart follow you around?
St. Patty's shenanigans tmrw? I wanna meet dudes lol. Why stop at coronavirus when you can get the clap, too?
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