What do they do with the elephants that die at the zoo
Cremation, why do you ask?
I think we have a bit of a problem
I just ate 3 burrito supremes and a crunchwrap...can't feel feet...I think I have diabetes
I am SOOO high
tell me about your high
HUGE THUMBTACKS
i cant remember past the part when we filled his tub with skittles.
I'm customer of the month for a 3rd time now at the Wine store. I've achieved so much in my life
she wouldn't stop crying, so we sang her to sleep. i'm guessing you will find her in the same position by the toilet in the morning. night.
Just remembered i had an ordained minister bless my booze last night.
There was a lot going on. It was easy to miss a 70 foot tall puppet.
It's like leaving me for his wife wasn't enough. He had to give me an STD too.
In this town being related to a brewing family or the owner of a sports team is like being royalty. It's like hooking up with the queen's nephew or something.
After the clumsiest day of my life I think it's safe to say my dream of being a ninja is dead. Memorial service with a glass of wine at 8pm
Dude. Got a sore throat. Don't know if it's because my body is rejecting Michigan or cause of the bad ass blow job I gave last night
Don't let me pee the bed... Its going to be one of those weekends
So I forgot to ask, how was that bartender you slept with two weeks ago?
Google chlamydia.
Sorry about kicking you last night but you don’t mess with a girls margarita bucket. Ever
Randomize
