remember them days when you seriously wanted your mom to marry rev run and we would always talk shit about justine?
joeyyyy why you always taken cheeseburgers from me?!?!?!
Dude I pulled down his pants and he already had a condom on
I almost caused an explosion; It's okay though. because everyone would have died having a good time.
What time did you start drinking?
Maybe.
Maybe isn't a time...
I don't drink so I see St. Patty's as an LSD type of day. Its like a more hardcore 420
I mean you were pretty drunk at one point you asked if we could have a glass of water ready for you in case you choked while bobbing for apples, but you said grape juice was preferable. You can't choke on an apple btw
Pretty sure the nurse said at one point I was in full restraints because I tried surfing my stretcher
I should put together a new mom basket for her. It would have diapers, vodka, ambien, and tissues for when she cries about her wasted youth.
I have tan lines from my nipple rings.
I can see the future and your future is full of penis
lol I'll trade you jello for a tampon
what a trade!
I know this sounds fake but she's deep frying a bar of soap right now
Come fucking get her
Give me one good reason why I should go with you.
Free beer.
..pick me up at 8.
still drunk on my way to class to give my presentation on the negative affects of alcohol on the body. hell yes.
we went to the skate park then back to her house for dinner, and somehow that ended with her making me blueberry pancakes at 2am
Randomize
