Sometimes I find that I've been touching my boob(s) without even realizing it.
Is showing up wearing the condom a bit presumptus
He was eating me out on the dryer...and his mom walked in with her laundry basket...
He wasn't the only one with a full load.
my text book just quoted the cookie monster
don't ever try to run hungover. just puked mid-run in front of an old couple that were going for a walk. they were horrified.
I just dropped macaroni right down my cleavage. For the sake of our future, I'm really banking on this being a turn on for you.
Numbies before the dentist, such a good idea.
The chick working the drive through at BK on New Years stuck her head out the window and told me there were no line ups for the bathrooms inside so i should go in there. I just kept squatting and peeing and told her it would prob help business.
Seriously what kind of college town is this? Nobody parties during the week or abuses perscription drugs
you took a potato out of your pocket and just started eating it raw. don't know where the potato came from though
21st birthday = success
I went back to the party but by then they were all sitting on the floor in the dark listening to we are the champions on full blast.
I haven't even booked my flights yet and I have my drug supply sorted
Just saw a couple chasing each other on lawn mowers. Oh South Knoxville.
Do not confuse my plans for being an adult though. I will ABSOLUTELY be practicing suturing, on my porch, while getting stoned.
You started singing Baby Shark, screamed you have no idea how it goes, then somehow turned the beat into Bohemian Rhapsody
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