Who is this?
Who do you want it to be?
Sarah Palin
I've got the updo, bangs, and glasses, but I'm blonde
i feel like my life has become an afroman song and idk whether i should be sad about that or not
The dutch village is so much worse hungover. Fuck them and their wooden shoes.
Not only do I have sand in my ass, but a crab pinched me while we were fucking. Still totally worth it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Her brother is deaf.
no wonder she was so good with her hands
You've eaten a Lean Pocket for every meal for at LEAST 3 days now. Get your life in line.
So how much of last night are we going to pretend never happened? Enough to stay friends?
I want to share a beverage of the alcoholic category with you, but I'm conflicted about getting out from under my covers.
She said it was unconventional for me to yell "Shazam!!" when I came inside her.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I mean, I would have, but I couldn't come up with a logical reason to bring up oral sex during an orientation.
I apparently pulled his dick out at the bar and started yelling "DICK PICS IN REAL LIFE!"
You know its a good morning when you wake up with blonde hair extensions in your pocket. . .
U just kept yelling her vagina wasn't a priority bc u had a bowl of cheerios calling your name
I pelvic thrusted so hard while he was eating me out that his nose started bleeding. I think it's broken. Trophy scars, right?
i just turned on my printer and found 10 pounds of german chocolate inside. i think i found where you hid your candy last night
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