This guy legit just tried to LSAT formal logic his way into my pants. Contrapositives and everything.
hows the party?
ists fjcssing insceredle
be there in 10
He took naked pictures of me and told me if I ever got to the Disney Channel level of fame he would help me out. I think i'm in love
I may have been hammered and in a wheelchair but I definitely remember asking the hospital reseptionist to marry me
I wasted some perfectly good semen on her
Nothing like a marijuana chart of usage in each country to make me understand math.
I don't have any bail money, if that's where this conversation is going
The only thing he told me before he passed out was that he is from Buffalo and I'm a bitch.
On a scale from 1-10 how fucked up would it be to buy weed with my fafsa money?
It's a study aid
I feel like I shouldn't be left around 30 year olds when I'm drunk
I have 2 phone numbers written on my vagina. I told you I shouldnt be left to my own devices after tequila shots.
I hate being on my period . Did you know that by the time I'm 30 I would've wasted 1,176 days of my life I could've had sex but couldn't bc I was on my period.
MY TITS JUST CAUSED A CAR ACCIDENT ON THE HIGHWAY! i kid you not!! i thinl the giy is actually dead
If a weird guy texts you in the near future asking if you are satan just go with it
My new gym is popular with trophy wives. They’re talking about yachts and plastic surgery
Learn their secrets! I want to meet men with Maseratis. The meat heads and Mustangs scene is getting old
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