Buying beer for freshmen. No matter what they ask for, I'm getting them Colt 45.
Redeem this text for a blowjob
I have come to the conclusion that if you don't fulfill your life ambitions you should go into porn
P.S, i don't recommend doing keg stands on top of vehicles.
We need you. We already made it on global news and are drunk at the election party.
she was stripping to whiskey lullaby. most depressed boner.
He told me that if his bed could talk, it'd write a medical journal. Guess it's too late to worry about that now.
By the third Id pass back i figured the bouncer had fucked one of us.
We got back from Mcdonalds and literally 5 minutes of being in your room, you wanted to go back because "We haven't been yet."
At one point they were sandwiching me, both petting my stomach, mad dogging each other. Then they somehow telepathically decided to both try to pull my pants down. Such nice guys.
I woke up with a thorn in my belly button. A THORN!
I think I've forgotten how to blink. Help plz?
all I know is id definitely throw up if you guys ever dated so if you do stay the fuck away from me
sex on a trampoline, in the rain, on ecstasy, just thought you should know.
I'm in the upstairs bathroom. I went to the bathroom after class and realized this is not a shit I want to have publicly. I ran home. We can go to lunch, just give me a min
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