but, i was nude. you really should respect my stupidity and delete them. please.
found an unmarked box of photos in the garage, they were from when my parents first got together. It was fun laughing at their ridiculous eighties outfits and hairstyles, until I found a pic of my dad. naked. with a boner.
I'm afraid my bank account can't handle syllabus week.
my Prof for my bio lab has his lab coat collar popped. it's 8 am and im too hungover for this guy
I just saw a dude get out of an ambulance with nothing but wallabees on
Is there a card that says "Sorry I got drunk at your Christmas party and tried to steal your monogrammed hand towels so that I could give you something nice for Christmas"?
The cops caught them pow wowing in the teepee at the entrance of the golf course at 5 am. But were still missing someone.
like he said he was barking at you while cumming in your face
I just tried on my "outfit" for tonight and I should just wear sweatpants and a sign on my face that says I like it in the ass. That would be more comfortable
Pizza rolls are incredible. They are like sex, except I have them sometimes
Six words: 3rd Degree Burn On My Dick
"I'm 95% straight," he says. Cut to him on his knees...by far the most beautiful guy I've ever fucked.
you can't get cum all over my hair and then tell me you just want to be friends
All I know is that I got to have an orgasm yesterday during sex so nobody can put a damper on my day, NOBODYYYYYY
I woke up an hour ago with orange fingers and a condom stuck to my head.. Wtf just happened?
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