Facebook lets you pick usernames now. You'd better log on and get yours before homewreckingwhore is taken...
no morals, dignity, or self respect ... just an empty condom wrapper and a facebook request
you're letting him buy you a plane ticket...to kentucky...so you can fuck him?
i know. i'm only adding to the interstate sex trade problem.
two words...techno handjob
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Oh yeah forgot to mention that I referred to myself as the oral sex heavyweight champion last night
No. No. And hell no. If you are driving a Honda Fit you are not allowed to give me a dirty look. No.
i would like you to please flash back to us blacked out in the bathroom when you told me i needed to take one for the team and have a threesome with you and jon to help your relationship. you then told me you had no issue putting ghb in my drink to make it happen.
Successfully defrauded the county government. What have you done today?
i swear to god it was like we were fucking in 9 dimensions
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The dominatrix coworker is currently listening to pop music that has been translated into an Irish dialect and sung by high school kids. Every day gets weirder here.
How many hotdogs are you going to eat today?
THE LIMIT DOES NOT EXIST.
I've spent so much time on tinder lately I just tried to left swipe an instagram photo of my neighbor
Girl just left one of the apts upstairs carrying a giant bottle of kahlula and a lunchable.... I feel like we could be friends
I would rather contract a disease that would eat me from the inside out and make me suffer painfully while it slowly killed me than to put myself through the 20 minutes of agony that is having sex with you ever ever again.
I think you're talking dirty but I'm not sure???
Just bought 2 liters of wine and frozen waffles for dinner. Is this 30?
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