Dual....:-)
then you asked me to turn your jeans into "jorts" just long enough to cover your ballsack
Is it bad when your hot neighbor is crying on her porch, and your 2nd thought is "maybe her boyfriend cheated on her and she'll want to fuck me for revenge sex?"
Perfectly normal.
She ditched her BF in the library to come see me wasted at a house party and i still ended up banging that rugby chick instead.
I just had a full choir singing the phrase pudding cup in my head. Too. Stoned.
At some point you realize they're vacuuming and you still have to sober up. Please find me a boyfriend thanks .
ahhhh just came to creep and you're not there AND your thong you were wearing last night is on the floor..someone has some explaining to do
Noo.... Like in the attic of a crack house with nitrous and fat chicks weird....
This girl looks like an elf and is obviously on coke. I want to be her.
Well I passed out before 4:20 on 4/20 so I deem it a failure AND a success.
I just showed this kid my nipples to work my shift tmw
Had sex on your trumpet just an fyi.
OH MY GOD YOU GUYS I JUST FOUND OUT I HAD PHONE SEX THE OTHER NIGHT
Who's phone is in my pants and why did I wake up clutching a handle of vlad?
i woke up on the couch at 5:24am, hangover, craving for some ribs, but i only had a bag of cheetos and a half empty beer. man what a breakfast.
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