you know you are hungover when... you set your alarm for the next time you think you are going to throw up
We didn't go..parents came home with patron wanting to play drinking games --we asked no questions
been sitting in chapter for 25 minutes. drinking last night's franzia out of a XXX vitamin water 10 bottle. recruitment chair has no idea. life is good.
she told me I give head better than a lesbian. I know it's a great compliment but it kind of threw me off.
I know it's not standard practice to meet the couple you donate to, but i'm curious as to what kind of people saw my picture and said, we want that girl's eggs
Based on the pics I have taken of hookups while they were passed out or sleeping, I have scientifically concluded that no two vagina lips are the same. They are like snowflakes.
This has been the most pleasant arrest experience I've ever had.
your house isnt even gonna be on google maps after this party
We just weren't working out together, on a completely unrelated note some guy that i talked to on his grinder account said i could crash at his place
I envy your ninja level of don't give a fuck
cops woke me up on the sidewalk and asked where my shoes are.. fuck if i know, im sleeping on the sidewalk! actually i didnt say that, i just cried until they gave me a ride home.
Tomorrow we start training our livers for St.Patrick's day. May God be with us.
Oh like it's the first time I've had a bowl of wine
I'm not trying to take your husband away from you, but can we have another 3way soon? I'm just desperate for good dick.
Okay so the couple who keep propositioning people for threeways are def siblings not bf/gf
So are you gonna do it or no you said they're hot
He kept trying to make out with me but I was just trying to show him Shrek memes
Randomize
