dude i need help, im throwing up blood.
no youre not, you just drank a pitcher of red koolaid trying to sober up.
oh, so thats why my junks red.
wow. cant help you there...
i'm home, then i'll come over
ightttt gangstaaaaaaaaaaaa
nvm.
Beverly Hills, 90210. Cleveland Browns, 0.
The kid in front of me is videochatting and typing to his gf. I should make poop/sex faces over his shoulder, right?
He must hate going to the bathroom. Every time he does he is reminded how small his dick is.
no where in the syllabus does it say "no alcoholic beverages allowed".
you inspire me to be a worse person
Ok well I'll be up all night studying if you need a wake up call or a place to put your penis.
1st rule of birth control pills: do not stop taking birth control pills. 2nd rule of birth control pills: do NOT STOP taking birth control pills.
Those tiny little fruit fly looking mofos. They fly past the phone and I grabbed them like Daniel-San
Good. Need a drinking partner later. FOR AMERICA!!!
Have you ever hotboxed under your comforter? Best. Decision. Ever.
I am naked and annoyed.
I WANT BLOOD. HERS. I WILL DYE A FABULOUS PAIR OF SUEDE PUMPS RED WITH HER BLOOD.
Well, I turned down sex again. This is guy #5 in the past 2 weeks. My vagina is going to seek emancipation.
Randomize
