oh and i really hope miley falls off this mountain she is climbing
halloween makes it hard to decipher real cops... from sexy men dressed up as them.
Paddidles count extra in the back of a cop car
I'm in the laundromat a drunk armenian guy keeps trying to help me fold my laundry. Ah i'm going to miss queens.
So after the reception we snuck back into the church for drunken hook up. we passed out there and woke up in time for 6am mass still dressed from the wedding. spiritually trashy or classy?
I can't tell if I miss summer or 5 times a day sex more.
I'm giving you a get out of sober free card for one of the nights
I woke up with a bagel in my mouth, still ate it. Free breakfast
She told me I was absolutely not allowed to sleep with him even though she knows I'm a rule breaker who loves a good challenge.
So anyway, I'm just floating along life with my vibrator and low expectations.
Yeah. We had phone sex then cried together, it was beautiful and heartbreaking
The longer the dick, the closer to Jesus when you’re on top.
Just peed on the front lawn of the capital building. Great American.
He’s over 6 feet has amazing posture and went to Harvard and has an awesome job and a great dick and loves Jesus and is an organ donor
Is this the guy you have listed as free food in your phone
Noooo he’s listed as free food #5
she gave me a ride on the back of her motor scooter and i swooned so hard
omg it's like all of your grease 2 fantasies come true i'm so happy for you
Randomize
