Texts From Last Night

• Favorite

  (770): View more from Georgia

  Dear Mark, please dispose of your crusty mcdonalds napkins used to jerk it at my desk

  (678): View more from Georgia

  discrete masterbation is a lost art

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  (770): Dear Mark, please dispose of your crusty mcdonalds napkins used to jerk it at my desk (678): discrete masterbation is a lost art http://tfl.nu/z067
  Replies (32) Good night (780) Bad night (2811)
• Favorite

  (814): View more from Pennsylvania

  You told the bartender you needed 2 beers, and a shot of his cum...

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  (814): You told the bartender you needed 2 beers, and a shot of his cum... http://tfl.nu/p3s1
  Replies (20) Good night (7376) Bad night (2132)
• Favorite

  (740): View more from Ohio

  becoming an adult blows. i don't think its possible for me to wake up for anything that doesn't involve kegs and eggs or half naked bums passed out in our yard.

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  (740): becoming an adult blows. i don't think its possible for me to wake up for anything that doesn't involve kegs and eggs or half naked bums passed out in our yard. http://tfl.nu/avz2
  Replies (6) Good night (1070) Bad night (2709)
• Favorite

  (248): View more from Michigan

  They are baked and once again have spent the last 45 mins talking about opening up a world wide business called "pickle on a stick"

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  (248): They are baked and once again have spent the last 45 mins talking about opening up a world wide business called "pickle on a stick" http://tfl.nu/5fi0
  Replies (13) Good night (4855) Bad night (1085)
• Favorite

  (561): View more from Florida

  Fuck. These are the symptoms I had when I was pregnant. This could be bad.

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  (561): Fuck. These are the symptoms I had when I was pregnant. This could be bad. http://tfl.nu/jajh
  Replies (5) Good night (917) Bad night (5500)
• Favorite

  (469): View more from Texas

  I fucked a 6'7 Danish man. In the ocean. At 5am. Greetings from Florida!

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  (469): I fucked a 6'7 Danish man. In the ocean. At 5am. Greetings from Florida! http://tfl.nu/oplt
  Replies (13) Good night (3906) Bad night (941)
• Favorite

  (860): View more from Connecticut

  Dude he was freaking out because he thought he was walking on crates, and he just kept saying help me

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  (860): Dude he was freaking out because he thought he was walking on crates, and he just kept saying help me http://tfl.nu/m9pd
  Replies (8) Good night (916) Bad night (685)
• Favorite

  (203): View more from Connecticut

  He's a little cute, in a dorky, I-know-for-a-fact-his-cock-is-huge kind of way

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  (203): He's a little cute, in a dorky, I-know-for-a-fact-his-cock-is-huge kind of way http://tfl.nu/eve3
  Replies (9) Good night (2612) Bad night (1126)
• Favorite

  (570): View more from Pennsylvania

  Well I think it's fate. Considering march is my fave month because it's my birthday and st. Patrick's day. And his name is Patrick. I'm sleeping with him all through march. No question.

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  (570): Well I think it's fate. Considering march is my fave month because it's my birthday and st. Patrick's day. And his name is Patrick. I'm sleeping with him all through march. No question. http://tfl.nu/xjer
  Replies (3) Good night (1847) Bad night (497)
• Favorite

  (412): View more from Pennsylvania

  Guess who has got hockey tickets for tonight? Only cost me road head going to and coming from the game

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  (412): Guess who has got hockey tickets for tonight? Only cost me road head going to and coming from the game http://tfl.nu/gj5a
  Replies (16) Good night (1728) Bad night (621)
• Favorite

  (480): View more from Arizona

  She wouldn't put out on the first date. I think my boner put a hole in my mattress.

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  (480): She wouldn't put out on the first date. I think my boner put a hole in my mattress. http://tfl.nu/19rj
  Replies (4) Good night (687) Bad night (1387)
• Favorite

  (212): View more from New York

  LISTEN TO ME! GAY. FIREFIGHTER. They are the most rare and precious kind of gay. The kind little gays dream of. It needs to happen.

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  (212): LISTEN TO ME! GAY. FIREFIGHTER. They are the most rare and precious kind of gay. The kind little gays dream of. It needs to happen. http://tfl.nu/na6f
  Replies (5) Good night (1444) Bad night (470)
• Favorite

  (630): View more from Illinois

  I made out with a dude last night who has an ex wife. Is this what post grad life is about?

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  (630): I made out with a dude last night who has an ex wife. Is this what post grad life is about? http://tfl.nu/f79i
  Replies (4) Good night (496) Bad night (563)
• Favorite

  (832): View more from Houston, Texas

  Two dicks, one me.

  (832): View more from Houston, Texas

  Yoga's definitely paying off.

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  (832): Two dicks, one me. (832): Yoga's definitely paying off. http://tfl.nu/ljaq
  Replies (9) Good night (979) Bad night (407)
• Favorite

  (225): View more from Louisiana

  Dudes don't just lick butts of chicks they're not into.

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  (225): Dudes don't just lick butts of chicks they're not into. http://tfl.nu/6a63
  Replies (3) Good night (651) Bad night (402)

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