I feel like ignoring a facebook event is a lot like a pocket-veto. The only difference is instead of opposing legislation, I don't want to go to your sketchy party.
he doesnt exactly give off the "im mature enough to use my penis" vibe
mom found the triscuts in her underwear drawer, its done.
You said eat breakfast. So i poured Baileys on top of m&m's. It taste just like like cereal I swear.
We should start a Help That Bitch Out Fund and split the donations evenly between you two.
You should have hard cock pics on hand to send in the situation that you can't stop driving, pull out your cock, browse the countless pics I've sent you of my tits, get him hard and text a pic through. I mean, it's simple sexting ettiquette.
My family will be here in an hour and I'm deciding between doing my makeup or saying fuck it and wearing what's left of last night's...
I WANT PIZZA BUT I ALSO WANT SELF ESTEEM
BUT LIKE WHO AM I TO EVER CARE ABOUT SELF ESTEEM
You can't just say you're dying of terminal cancer everytime they try to card you
She said "I feel like I haven't reached my full potential" and I couldn't figure if she meant in life or with the weed..
Stop acting like the Lucky Charms you're feeding people is actually ecstasy.
There is a couple fucking in the outback bathroom and at first I thought it was sick but than I remembered my Outback fantasy with you and decided I can't pass judgements.
Is it sad the checkout lady had to inform my mom she can't buy alcohol before 8am?
i just read a article called "Booze, Drugs, and Bipolar Disorder"... i think someone is writing the memoirs of my life
I found my parents stash of sex toys. You know my green one? My mom has it...in purple. I HAVE THE SAME VIBRATOR AS MY MOTHER
Randomize
