hypothetically speaking is slutty or smart to buy plan b before we go on spring break so i dont have to get it in mexico
got delayed, meet you at the bar soon, found a shopping cart, i am now getting pushed to the bar by some guy that was peeing in the alley i found the cart in
I wish I could but I can't. No beer pong or sex on a hammock...such an unproductive weekend
I think Vodka is my favorite. Everything else ties for second.
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I took the weekend off because he and I were supposed to go to Vegas for our anniversary and get a hooker remember?
Ah, yes. Who says romance is dead?
Basically I don't wanna put on pants...but I'm stoked for drinking my face off tomorrow.
We went to Olive Garden so high we didn't talk and managed to be awkward enough for the waiter to ask if it was our first date
I threw up this morning to Silent Night playing in background. It was actually quite soothing.
I want you to know that the guy who peed in your bed got fat.
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I washed my sheets. I did out of respect for my previous and current sexual partners.
We did hand stuff while watching teenage mutant ninja turtles so I guess you could say it's getting serious
So if he doesn't show up do we eat his birthday cake? Because I'm stoned and wrestling is on. What's the proper protocol
just turned another straight guy gay. Goddamn the church must hate me
I am eating croutons on my bathroom floor. Are you happy?!
also, when i showed up he started talking to me and eventually asked me if the girls treated me well. i went on to talk about my sex life. he was talking about his secretaries.
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