I love black thongs
I'm not to broken up about it. Our relationship was worse than a coldplay song.
he just put it in my mouth and said "go"
she thought don quixote was a type of tequila.
He's paying me $45 to clean his room and $55 if i find the oxy that he lost.
Just saw a motorized bathtub. I think this college thing is gonna work out.
I've realized that my life is in no way structured to be compatible with monogamy. I'm not adjusting to this well.
We're like a dynamic duo.
Bisexual and Proud, Lesbian and Loud.
just chugging fertility tea and vodka, no big deal.
Yeah and you keep saying "I know how to win America." While running away from us
That shit was hard as fuck. It felt like a mountain entering my vagina.
HELL YEAH TIME TO KICK THE CHILDREN
wasn't that the evening we made out with the girls from the dental school, drank 3000 beers, almost had to beat up a guy at the strip club and James nailed some hot piece of tail and took her OSU windbreaker, which my dad went on to wear multiple times after finding it in the garage.
Yes. To all of that. Yes.
I'm too depressed to drink my wine. That is what I would call a serious problem
You can't hold me to anything I said last night; I was drunk on orgasms.
Randomize
