idk why but i just wanna to have sex with the idea of him. i don't even wanna meet him.
Pretty sure I just has te same conversation as you. He suggested I get, sell, and fuck the hoes, and once all was said and done, that I should refer afforementioned hoes to him, to perform felatio.
How do you politely bring up someone's criminal record?
A picture just appeared on facebook. I am puking in the toilet, you are next to me puking in the sink. I think we have our christmas card.
i think he was starting go for a boob grab when we both realized the middle of a public tennis court wasn't the place
My stepdad and I just tag-team hit on a server at McDonald's. This is the man I should have grown up with.
You know I found it really difficult to find a full lenght picture for the egg donor site where I wasn't holding any alcohol...
I found pix on her phone of me passed out and her sticking things up my ass. Its over.
I woke up with broken tostitos all over my bed and a snap chat of myself flipping off the camera.
Alcohol won't break your heart. I mean, unless it's all gone maybe
I just quoted part of the Pokemon theme song in a sext... And it worked
You’re welcome stay at my house. But, you gotta piss in the toilet
I’ll call you in a minute. Trying to book an AirBnB so I can finally bang the yummy guy from yoga
Your downward dog is going to rock his cock. I’m jealous
i just wanted have a romantic star gaze moment with him. untill he let out a massive fart.
It’s bad enough my brother slept with half of the sorority this year, but now he’s lifeguarding at the club and every divorcée and cougar in town is asking me for his number. My twin is a manwhore and I’ve become his pimp.
Randomize
