there's just something about her that screams "i'm into chicks who wear flannel"
if i dont get laid while im dressed as Tim Tebow, i'm just staying true to the costume.
I don't care how ugly she is, I can't turn down a free movie +bj. In this economy that's downright irresponsible
this is like black Friday for my dealer. I'm literally standing in line.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I need to shower, but I have no shower curtain... I think I can get by with a whore bath and a hat for one more day.
Oh damn. God have mercy on everything w a dick in a ten mile radius.
the mechanics of walkigng feel weird right now everyone lools like a demon
what does alcohol mean
Me, him and the recently stolen carpet walked down the road and into the strip club. We had to check the carpet with our coats, it didn't mind missing out too much, later the door guy at Subway held carpet during late night sandwich selection.
I put ketchup in a girls hair last night. I need a sorry balloon
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
every time someone would wish me happy birthday I would be like "thanks happy birthday to you too"
But if I live with you I'll help pay rent. Only if you promise no 50 shades of what the fuck internet hookups
You're just a heartbreaker with a knitting problem
He had a flex off with himself in the mirror but he thought it was someone else for at least 20minutes.
Well drunk me was looking out for sober me again, hid the beer and bought another case for me
Idk... I'm not sure why anyone would use a flesh light in general. Let alone hook it up to a wifi device.
Randomize