when i asked what day 420 fell on this year, she answered so quickly i knew i found my soulmate.
I stumbled into my living room at 4 a.m. to find him hurling my laptop across the room and his pants around his ankles. Clearly his night didn't go as planned.
She washed her feet in the sink at white castle. I want this girl in my life.
Go ahead. I tried to back up ur budhism story but she mite be catching on
Dammit. I hoped that would work. Just tell her I'm doing my pilgrmidge to Nepal or something.
got delayed, meet you at the bar soon, found a shopping cart, i am now getting pushed to the bar by some guy that was peeing in the alley i found the cart in
I am listening to lecture and I can hear us in the background talking about anal beads.
You just made it sound like a children's toy! It's a functioning body organ, my vagina is not a gameboy!!!
If you make 120 dollars and I walk instd of drive and don't eat or smoke this week we can pay rent
I danced with this guy last night, I left like I was humped by a blind baby kangaroo trying to body-box.
We smoked a blunt in a stall where a drag queen was fucking a bartender in the ass. So theres gonna be a second date :)
I got really adventurous too. Like. Balls in the mouth adventurous.
I just feel like I'm worth a little bit more than your recycled nudes...
This Asian instant coffee I found in ur kitchen is like crack. Who knew I could feel my heart beating in my asshole after one cup of this happiness.
Depends how u look at it. Half-full, half-empty, or how should I shave my pubes
It was pretty awesome. I drank out of a stein and attempted to dance to dubstep with some older guys in leiderhosen.
Randomize
