I wanna eat
then frost
then eat your cupcake
I think I won the penis lottery.
Just made ouyt with a dude on the real wporld...I said I dont want my face blired out
so after morning sex, she rolled a joint and turned on sports center
you might have found the rare bro goddess. i thought they were myth
she asked if mt Rushmore was natural or man made
She is sleeping in a dress because she's too drunk to put "real clothes" on
his tattoo said carpe diem which i thought was ironic considering his epilepsy
I came downstairs to find I had missed the 3some on my kitchen floor but not the pukefest or ER trip after it. This is what happens when the voice of reason is otherwise occupied
I'm dealing with this like an adult, cupcakes and beer.
Everyone's impressed that I actually got pee all over his car since I'm a girl and they're a little curious..
Is it wrong that I get drunk and let him eat me out then fall asleep? He offers me so much and yet I do nothing. I feel like a republican.
I feel like I have a very capable uterus.
P.s. I loved that your balls smelled like coconut
think before you get married my friend it's my birthday and just got done jacking off
he just asked me that if he was a penguin and I was a penguin if I would fuck him
Randomize