Dude she looked like Jerry Garcia's knuckles
I have two black x marks on my hands.
Yep you got cut off last night after a stripper bent over in front of you and you screamed very loudly 'I can see your soul from here'
damnit I wish I could remember that.
Its about making memories worth repressing
frozen peaches as icecubes. vodka Sundays just got wayyyy better
If my bosses could see, smell or hear me right now they would understand why its a horrible idea to keep the office open sundays
Im shirtless eating a burrito. How urgent is this?
Can you confirm that Victor fucked a girl for Jack in the Box tacos?
I cannot, but I know he fucked a girl for a Nerf hoop and a "Kingpin" dvd.
Dude, she literally just asked me if her mac'n'cheese makes me horny. I think I found the one.
I'm pretty sure you thought I could absorb alcohol through my dress
Who topped off the "random beer mix" beer bong with a pinch of pepper?? All you could taste was busch and pepper...
he told her he was actually impressed that she had fucked more people in this house than the four dudes living in it.
And then we were riding the keg in the pool like an 8 second rodeo...naked.
I really want to fuck that guy in the full wind breaker suit
You were so proud of your stupid "magic trick" but all you did was piss on the couch. don't talk to me for a few days.
And I'm sorry for punching you in the face when I drunkenly threw my sandwich
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