they say Disney World is the happiest place on Earth. It's a close second to the Super 8 on route 18. That place holds some great memories.
so i did it. i barked while i was ejaculating. not a word was said by either of us afterwards.
so how much did i say i owed you?
$5 and a new fuck buddy.
i just complicated the hell out of my summer by fucking him this early on
Just saw two dudes run across the street carrying a mini keg and a scaled model of the empire state building. Missed this town
I figure hes like disneyworld. You know youre only going once or twice in life. Might as well have fun and ride the rides
those kids just got delivered to the party by the pizza guy
"I gave a guy a handjob last night, on a dog bed, inside a fireplace. It's going to be a good year."
xanax give me strength to not ask where we stand with booty calls
I never turn down an adventure. My life is like a sexual Lord of the Rings.
WHY IS THE HAIRSPRAY SOUNDTRACK PLAYING IN THE LIQUOR STORE
For some reason drunk me always leaves sober me a banana in the morning.
Just hit on a girl with the line, "You look like Natalie Portman if she did drugs". Strike 1
Sorry for face licking, I probably won't do it again.
Also, I love cats. I sat on the floor and they sat with me.
So, is Canada considered an excessive distance to go for a booty call? Asking for a friend...
He was gone when I woke up. But he left skid marks on my sheets and our unopened bottle of Titos is missing
New Rule: No more sleepovers with guys we met on Reddit
Randomize
