K, im just throwing this out there, i am not making out with any of his friends... Especially the cross eyed one.
I stood up and a chip flew out of my shirt and landed in the chip dish. I just walked away.
she looked like the bat from fern gully.
The paper boy just woke me up in the front yard again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm going to kill the bastard that switches my hot hookups from the previous night with ugly chicks
he yelled 'rock me amadeus!' when he came
i love that song!
NOT THE POINT
yeah, its right past the deli mart where i showed my right tit for mozzarella sticks.
Blacked in riding a tandem bicycle with a stranger. We stopped for hot dogs.
No worries. On my way home to get ski poles and wipe the sick off my face. Then it's time to get drunk in the park
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I hate that you live in a gated community. I feel your guard judges me every time I go to your house at 3 am an leave at 5am
you made me suck your tit in the car and kept saying "good boy. I love you so much. good boy."
We had a moment of silence for all of the orgasms he gave me with his beard before he shaved it off.
If I die on my walk home, please come claim the body. There is $30 in my left shoe for you....for pizza
Nothing says girls night like wine cheese and pregnancy tests 😂
If I take a couple more shots I won't even know he's a Mormon that drives a motorcycle
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