Definitely got drunk and sent her a literal picture of my asshole. I titled it " you"
I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE.
Osama's death just kick started our Cinco de mayo celebration. Margaritas for anyone wearing red white and blue!
Come find me, I'm the girl sitting alone in taco bell at 9 in the morning drinking concealed beer with a straw
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But hes like a baby bird with a broken wing that i want to FUCK.
I think she's going to be dangerous to drink with, but I'm ready for the adventure.
Why is there an ambulance refusal in my pocket? I'm never going drinking with you again.
Are you stuck outside of your house because you forgot to walk up stairs? Cuz I've been there.
If you don't ever hear from me again, just know that I loved you
Jesus Christ that's like a real possibility
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I had 2 shots but she spilt one on me. Kinda mad but kinda grateful
yep, just sat in the backseat of my car for about five minutes looking for the vodka soaked underwear,when i came to the realization that i really gotta start getting my shit together..
dude, where did you go? french fries taste like numbers
I had to ask her to let go of my cock this morning so I could go home. She just kept saying "no, please, no..."
She is crazy bro, she'll kiss me after eating her ass but looses her fucking mind if I double dip a french fry in "our" ketchup!
the sex is SO much better when he thinks im going insane
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