He belongs with you like a mcdonalds playground belongs in Chernobyl
The stoners next door have their couch on the sidewalk again, shirtless, soaking their feet in a baby pool and listening to loud ukulele music. I want their life.
i know you like preteen girls so i'm gonna offer you some advice...dump a bucket of glitter on yourself and walk into the sunlight. they will come running.
What I dont get, is for a man with a penis his size, to choose to go back with another girl instead of one that he says is the best sex he's ever had. He cant afford to be picky.
The question is do I invite my fuck buddy to my graduation party now that my girfriend found out about her?
I'm so disappointed in myself I can actually taste it.
Does it taste like semen?
Somehow me showing up to/breaking into her house only to find I was a week early for the party became a night of weed cookies and sex.
Why doesn't he get that I would rather give him blow jobs than be in a relationship?
I just used my glow stick from the dance to find my way in the bathroom to puke. Who wants me on their corporate team
Still trying to figure out where I was when someone broke the lawn chair and put it in the bathroom.
I WANT PIZZA BUT I ALSO WANT SELF ESTEEM
BUT LIKE WHO AM I TO EVER CARE ABOUT SELF ESTEEM
At the end of the night i was really thirsty and tied to a bedpost
I've only fucked to 2 Fleetwood Mac songs, that must be why my life feels so empty.
I mean, I want you to have freaky orgasmic fun to entertain me, but I don’t want you to risk HIV or car crashes
it was like 6 shots in and he was automatically my type
Randomize
