Asian chick on skype stripping for me. Hold on give few min
Just toasted a glass of brandy with my own reflection to my dimples. Why are you not here?
Banged a lazy eyed chick last night. It was like fucking an iguana.
you know it's gonna be a good 4/20 when you start saving up for it in january.
I experienced pure joy just moments ago when I looked down and saw that I had another pop tart to consume down my mouth hole.
At least your night didn't end with three cops seeing your ass and you sitting on the ground in a wig throwing your shoes at people
I also think about what hot dudes penises are gonna look like when theyre 80 and it's not pretty
Totally just drove past you riding your bike. I was like damn, that looks like a cute little hipster boy, and then I realized it was you and that I'd already banged you and it kinda made my day. I hope you're well. Come over soon?
Watching this game makes me realize that we have yet to do Skype shots. What kind of long distance alcoholics are we?
Btw any and all sexual fantasies or arousal I had about cops is null and void.
she fell THROUGH the wall. All in all id have to say that my neighbors where pretty chill about it tho.
I showed my cat the amount of coke I had. She looked concerned.
I mean, how am I going to build a relationship on trust if he finds out I roofied him?
Would I do it again? Probably not but still,I don't regret a single ratchet thing I've done in college.
He made me ask permission to to cum and it made me cum.
Randomize
