So random guy from last night came over tonight. I told myself I wasn't going to sleep with him but he had some killer dirty talk and a big penis in his arsenal...what was I supposed to do? Supposedly he lost his virginity to his wife and since their divorce a year ago I'm the 1st girl he's slept with, I feel like I just re-took his virginity...I feel like a rockstar.
ashley and jimmy are about to have sex on degrassi.... EVERYONES GETTING LAID BUT ME
Nights of college: 1. Virgins: 1. Yes.
I know im too high when i think porn has an interesting story line.
She left me a voicemail too. It's just her moaning her name repeatedly
Hey bro, did you ever hear from the background investigator that i was supposed to bang?
Sometimes I wonder how you ever made friends then I remember it's because you blew your way to semi-relevance
It was like the titanic mixed with those sad puppy commercials mixed with jello shots
Drunbk and roasting marshmallows on my stove. Accidentally singed the catr's fur but she'sd alright.
She told me I made the cut, and to write my name and number on the white board by the door. I was the 7th number down.
10/10 would definitely still fuck you dressed as squirrel
This is worse than naked and afraid. This is drunk and confused.
Well I didn't get a shacker shirt but I somehow managed to come home with superman socks
look, bitch. one day when everyone i care about deserts me for my severe moral depravity, you're going to be the only one i have.
i can't wait.
Actually, my eyes didn't start bleeding until the next day. So it was a pretty awesome night overall.
Randomize
