You make homosexuality sound like a cult.
where are my pants?
you were passing out with two blankets and the person next to you was cold so you gave him your pants to keep warm
chatroulette drinking game turned into a foursome.
No. No, there is no forgiveness for this. The only way I'm forgiving you for this is if you somehow convince your sister to have sex with me. In her car.
Probably shouldn't have worn my jeans covered in blood from last night to class.
That's not a good night. A good night is waking up with no skirt, no money, and the imprint of the edge of the bar on your forehead.
It's take your daughter to work day... I really shouldn't be here right now
At no time is it ever okay for my doctor to compliment my tattoos, when giving me a physical exam.......
My 19 year old brother just hooked up with his 45 year old cougar kindergarten teacher. These sorts of situations make me realize why the sorority girls call him Wondercock
I just really don't even know what I would do with a boyfriend... Like do I just kiss it and then leave it in the corner? Like how often does it eat??
Do you know this guy sitting in front of us? Asking for my vagina.
Well we found Mark's missing underwear. They're pinned up on Mike's trophy wall.
he came over last night and we fucked with the great british baking show on in the background. it was beautiful
i just watched a 27 minute video about owls...that high.
You mentioned his name and i threw up a little.
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