HIV tests are more positive than that guy
When I went to court, my judge's name was Honorable Ball. I couldn't stop laughing.
that probably didn't help your case.
my ass just sighed. even my farts are tired.
im officially scared..,i finally realized who my boyfriend reminds me of! spencer pratt
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
don't read that magazine bro. I came in it
Not only did I see you last night, you had me help you meet women by convincing them you were deaf and only I understood your sign language
I'm gonna play a drinking game called "Sarah takes the train"
i did the responsible thing and pissed myself...
Hey. Be honored that I consider you the genital expert. I know alot of candidates for the position.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
In preparation for st patty's day I finally had a shamrock shake, and I invested in an app that will apparently keep me from drunkenly texting you pictures of my tits this weekend. Please let me know if you want to not be put on the "forbidden" list!
I have an epic ass bruise from a wheel tonight and I am drunk now because I decided vodka heals all wounds.
No piss test, hell yeah
FALSE ALARM. PISS TEST. I NEED YOUR PISS.
If a handjob meant commitment I would literally touch zero dicks
So, I ran into Garrett last night in the laundry room.
Oh really? First post break-up run in. How'd it go? Awkward?
Um. We had sex on a washing machine.
We will discuss everything tomorrow i presume. Including the sweaty naked tango.
Randomize