went in for an STD check and they referred me to an alcohol and drug councilor. kick me when i'm down.
How do you say "I always respond to booty calls" when you give a guy your number?
One of my other friends found me and the dog in the back seat of this one guy's car....I don't even know
Judging by the hole in the wall by the door, the mis-matched shoes by the door, and the door hanging off one hinge... i'd say he's on the loose.
yea im pretty sure it has something do with my love of forearms...
So "Abstinence August" was a bust. Maybe I'll try for "Sex-free September" or "Only if we're facebook official October"
If he's the sort of guy that will fuck in a public restroom, he's the sort of guy that will cheat on his gf. I'm goin for it.
Celebrated the veterans I suppose, my mouth tastes of gin and black outs
There. Isnt. A. Single. Person. Who. Is. Not. High. At. Church.
Now go get drunk with your fam and get back into ur christmas groove. No time for gonnorhea
Would I be crazy if I drove 1,000 miles for some dick? What mile does it become ridiculous?
Good news. His dicks gotten wayy bigger since high school. I love Thanksgiving break.
Thanks for listening. You're the first guy I've ever worked with who I didn't want to fuck.
It was pretty awesome. I drank out of a stein and attempted to dance to dubstep with some older guys in leiderhosen.
Your sister walked upto me in the middle of the hallway and was like get us beer or shes never having sex with you ever again, wtf
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