Please tell me I didn't pass out while we were having sex last night... and if so I am sooooo sorry.
trsut me youll find me, im the only kanye west here and every1 is chanting dbag at me
So I got a little fucked up on the punch, and made out with the family friend. Which is apparently morally reprehensible. I don't get that.
Ran into that hot funeral director in the bar two days after the wake. pretty sure we drunk made out.
Grandpa would have been proud
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I think I might stay on campus instead of going home for thanksgiving and see how many townies I can hook up with and no one will be around to judge
She definitely pulled a diaper out of her purse and cleaned up the vodka with it, where do you meet these people?!
The fish's death was accidental. We all said a few words at his funeral. Roomie wanted to play only the good die young as he swirled down the toilet bowl
I cant. There's fences everywhere and I think I have a boyfriend. Its fabulous.
Currently doing my walk of shame down a floating dock. No more guys who live on a boat EVER AGAIN
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I told you, I don't give a SHIT about their music. I JUST. WANT. TO FUCK. THE BASSIST.
There's two sisters at this place and they look competitive. Try for a threesome tonight?
I've been with my family a total of 20 minutes and I'm ready to go on a bender. This is going to be a long weekend.
I'll start working on my manners when you stop using please and thank you in the bedroom.
hey can you send me that pic of that dude?...if this isn't Rochelle's phone...can you please find and tell Rochelle to send me that picture of that dude?
Is it too early to start looking for freshmen penises to corrupt with our liquor and yoga pants?
I was just wondering the same thing! Gotta be any day now
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