So I have to ask... did I meet your lumberjack expectations? I mean, minus the red flannel and all.
brass monkey on radio. cant stop dancing.
about to try to wax my asshole... wish me luck
when a 14 year old is judging you, you know you've had too much to drink
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
May God have mercy on my new vibrator.
the only thing i can think of after seeing avatar is "when are they gonna make avatar porn?"
y-o-u-r-e = you are, y-o-u-r = your. you are a bag of douche not your bag of douche. if you're going to insult me at least do it in proper english. that is all.
"too many" and "free shots" never belong in the same sentence
Swear to god, if I have to wingman for you on my honeymoon I'm gonna be pissed
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Pretty sure I can show you the text you sent me stating some interest in my penis entering your mouth if said circumstances were met.
Hey my results were negative. Your chlamydia train stops here. Happy hunting!
I think this shark week should consist of getting drunk enough to actually go hunt sharks ourselves.
The way I kissed her was actually pretty charming and then it devolved to car sex
Yeah but if you conceived a child on a park slide that would be pretty awesome
I'm dancing with a sandwich I just made cause I'm so happy how delicious it tastes, that high haha
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