i find it depressing how it takes me longer to find a good video compared to the actual jacking off process.
we saw you sitting at the door of the dorm trashed, wrapped in DANGER tape with a stolen balloon around your wrist
Is it cum slut, cumslut or cum-slut? Sexting, plz advise ASAP
Im celebrating the fact that the one guy who has ever denied me has just come out of the closet
I swear the crows are laughing at me.
You my friend are stoned into submission
If I was gonna be at your campus for halloween weekend, I'd dress up as the masked horny fairy and give out condoms. I'm so thoughtful.
I promised him we could have sex if he would let me take him to the hospital to get stitches.
Oh I was gonna ask you the same thing...? It's official ask anyone to see your husbands dick day.
Yeah. I asked if there was a finger in my ass at some point or if I had a weird dream. So far he hasn't responded
Well the good news is ill probably have my new boobs by the time he sees me naked
Hey, I think I showed you a picture of my nephew while we were fucking last night. Sorry, I know it's weird, I just really love that kid. Again, sorry.
We damn well better have a snow day tomorrow. We just broke out the rum.
so hungover. idk whos house or comp im on
well it was naive of you to actually think you're the only bday sex he had lined up for him today. I'm just suprised he actually had a line forming outside of his room
Guy just rode past on a lowrider bike smoking a blunt, I want his life
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