Thong +tight pants =hungry butt. Not a good look on big women! Walmart sucks.
Thanks for the birthday present, i had so much fun playing with it
Are you talking about my vagina?
my quiz for the book was only 2 questions and my one answer was sorry and then a sad face
I'm sorry for coming into your work place and trying to smuggle you out in my purse.
laying naked on couch sucking water through straw. i can still feel the orgasm from last night. thank you mdma.
I think the pivotal moment was when we used the see and say as a drinking game with shots of whiskey. It was all downhill after that.
How many weeks is it acceptable until I can start bringing freshman back?
I just wanna go somewhere and not be judged for wearing spandex shorts that make my ass look like a slice of fucking heaven. Is that so much to ask??
I'm gonna give him birthday punches. On the dick. With my mouth.
We had a One Night Stand 6 months ago but he just Facebook invited me to his wedding. Who the fuck does that.
I like that you use a Disney movie to describe the starting of our BDSM relationship, lmao
I have chicken nuggets, lube and brand new batteries, he can stay at work charting all weekend for all I care, I'm set.
If I die tonight somebody's going to have to let all my tinder matches know.
Pretty sure keeping my vibrator in the same drawer with the weed makes it work better. I fall asleep almost immedi
I wish people could trade lives with me for a day so they could see how much better my life is compared to theirs
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