why am i having a flashback about somewhere we were this weekend with music videos playing? Spike jonze brothers place?? Help me out
...just for future reference, one Four Loko can fits PERFECTLY in a venti iced coffee cup from Starbucks
I feel compelled to tell you that I woke up this morning and found an entire corn on the cob in my purse. Ive decided not to question my drunken behavior anymore, and to just accept it as my lifestyle.
Real friends wouldn't let me shotgun a 4loko after already seeing me trying to eat a girl out through her jeans.
I'm playing a game where i judge myself by whats in my cart. Also have 3 bright red giant buckets
The best part is when you puked in your slurpree and the 7 eleven guy still made you pay for it
So I just saw Jonah Hill at LAX and decided my fat fetish is back
You should go to counseling for that
I was trying to get everyone to go to the bar but I puked on my hands, so nobody took me seriously.
Had sex with the Irish bartender in Spain. So that happened.
You really could become the cat lady we've always dreamed of.
Naked chocolate chip pancake making. I just spilled mix all over the place. My boobs are covered in flour. This is not going well.
Mom called last night while I was at the bar and asked where I was. I told her I was on the highway to the danger zone while the guys were humming the top gun theme.
This is the beginning of the end. Testicle Tuesdays and free ball Friday are going to scar people for life
Dude that picute of your balls will haunt my nightmares
And if you haven't kicked a pigeon you haven't started your morning right
I went out to dinner with the girls thinking I'd be home early. Instead I ended up in the Englishman's hotel room. Long Live The Queen.
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