Just saw two guys having a lawn mower race, and their girlfriends cheering them on. Get me out of Tehachapi,
Note to self. Condoms are not microwavable.
Last night i was so high that i came home and did a taste test of every vitamin water and wrote theyre grade down on paper.
I'm taking child development now so if you get pregnant i can raise your child no worries
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
his fiance had made him a calendar of pictures of her. he asked if he should take it down and i said no. i wanted her to watch.
Went to my car this morning. Found a waffle from Waffle House in the front seat. No idea how it got there. So hung over I ate it.
craigslist free llama. are you in or are you in?
I've reached the point to where my pre-gaming needs to be limited to pre-inning-ing
I'm just gonna plan on never getting a bf. everything I touch turns to gay
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
speaking of creep .. love how I kept touching strangers faces at the bar ... and saying "Don't worry I'm a dermatologist"
idk wtf was in that bud but I was talking to my dead dog last night bro holy shit
Yes. I'm realizing that sports games are good reasons to drink. I just cheer when everyone else cheers.
Just whisper "I fucked your boyfriend" in her ear and be done with it.
i believe in u and ur pee
You ran outside of the party to do the rain dance and swim in puddles
Randomize